Hey Sel, just saw your blog. Ack, din think to check earlier. hope everything is alright? no? well i don't have any brilliant ideas. I'm like the worse person you should ask about relationship stuff (just look at my lousy record) but, right now, i think he's feeling bored le. that's my guess of course. i mean. that's what happen to me sometimes and i feel like a total jerk cos i treat my then current badly. so.... maybe u should talk to him about your probs, or ask him to read your blog. maybe he'll get the idea, maybe not. and maybe he will realise what's wrong on your side. let him know how you feel. and lastly don't pressure yourself to meet up just because you must. it should be you are meeting because BOTH of you want to. else it's just gonna be sad. that's well, the best i can help u with for now. my blog is really lousy at updating. take care sel!

Confused Chaos is how i would describe it. i want, i Can't, i musn't, yet i miss, i hunger, i shouldn't, and i desire, i wish, that which i resist, i deny. For you U're smart enough to figure this out.

Ok. never post stuff u don't want others to read. duh. but this is a blog. Ok. It seems i must really confirm and postively make up my mind! and i shall remind true to that thought. oh well. puzzled? go figure. tummy still hurts. BAD. well it's not really my tummy, but... i think u get the idea. i can keep meeting up with mr toilet bowl. :) for now.

Oh well. Remain as friends. somehow i don't feel that disappointed. wierdly enough. guess there wasn't much of spark? but hell we are good friends. wierd. oh well. hmm. had a horrible day/night yesterday. i had a runny tummy for the entire day. the toilet bowl became my temp best friend. must have visisted it at least 20 times. puked too. horrible horrible. gonna see a doc today. hopefully the medicine will help now. if i were feeling better i'm gonna pop by to jenny's place for tonight! hopefully anyway

right. things seem better now. the not so wise person was right. it was a better day. oh well. busy day at work. man man man. i'm soooo sleepy here. amazing how we all can be so stupid at times. oh well. this will be my last update for quite a while. till i get the mood to write again. not much a blog i know. but hell this was just a experiment to see how this thang works anyway. Pardon the slang :) cheers

Sigh. today was a sad/wierd/funny day. i'm just confused and sorry. i just don't know what to say. bah! as someone not so wise, but with a head for sayings said, today was a (see above) day, tomorrow will be a better day. i hope. signing off.

ok. cool i totally was so tired last night i din have chance to blog. it's all silly ger's fault ;p u know what i mean. anyway just to say, and can save you your money and watch a better movie instead, don't watch dumb and dumberer and it's sequels, like dumberest and dumberestingest. totally full of *shit* yeap! the only good part was the shit part, got a giggle outta me (snigger, whatever). well, silly ger, u paid for it, but well glad u enjoyed it more than me. i know i heard siwei laughing loudly alot. crass humour with lame acting = bad. crass humour with good timing and acting = good. smart humour with flesh show (aka charlie angels) = fantastic. so u know my views on this. heh. oh well. wednesday was fine day. well, nothing worth remembering. just that i read the archives of sel's blog and boy oh boy. what a load of fuss something blew up on. u should read the archives man... ;p that's all for now. gonna amuse myself with anarchy online. haven't played it for 2 days and am suffering from withdrawal symptoms. damn what a fine game! cheers

ooo cool new day. well my sunday was boring. so totally nothing happened, beside being bugged at 4am in the morning to go for a walk, (i was sleeping) so i din answer the call till 7am. anyway, back to monday, was a good start to the morning. nothing to do, slacked till 12pm, when i left camp for my medical. after "con"vincing my dad to drive me there (i keep refusing to learn how to drive) i queued up and etc the sars thingy. then after seeing the doc, i left. then they called and asked me to return. but well we were wayyyyyyyyy too far to return so we proceeded on to get my contact lens at thompson plaza. then reaching home i left for the BSC 3 G(eneration) reunion dinner i organised. seeing that i stupidly (yes i know) told everyone that being late is ok (better then u come on time, cos no one will and then all say cannot make it...) i waited for quite awhile b4 the first persons arrvived! adelyn lee was helpful enough to book a place @ fish & co. so there we were, 16 of us, all from 3 Generations of BSC. Ridhwan, Lawrence, Gevelle, Adelyn Han, Adelyn Lee, Jennifer, Yahui, Me, Michelle, Nadia, Elliott, Selena, Collin, Mira, Conan & Jeff, seated in this order. after talking crap for mostly a long long time, and rejecting a few orders (cos they were bad) we proceeded to pay the bill! horrors & horrors. i won't go into it but needless to say we took a long time over the bill. *shivers* they hid my sunglasses. bah only finally returned me. expensive orginal leh! dun pray pray. we then went to take photos. outside centerpoint. i'll post links to it when i get emailed them from adelyn L. funny thing is, u kinda miss having all these friends together. never really had the chance to all meet up after our term of service is over. it's been a long road together guys, but it was great every single moment! ok i'm getting sappy. afterwards, we took the NE line, me and elliott chatted for 1/2 an hour b4 we took the last bus home. and then it's me typing this really really condensed version. ok i'm actually deviating from my standard rants and writes. but i kinda think it's appropiate to write this down. good memories guys! cheers!

Silly ger : if u're reading this u're gonna think i'm fickle? hmm well. i'll explain to you in due time. anyway it became a shouldn't. so have fun guessing what i'm talking about. i'm being obscure for a purpose. leaving u with this... Atomic Kitten - The Last Goodbye From the album "Feels So Good" Ain't no headlights on the road tonight Everybody here is sleeping tight Ain't nobody gonna find us here We'll disappear There's a dancer in the arms of love And he's dancing on the sky above And the truth is that we'll never know Where love will flow Aim high, shoot low We gotta aim high, shoot low baby Chorus: Ain't no headlights on the road tonight Ain't nobody here to make it right Cause we couldn't seem to find a way For love to stay If you had another night to give I would have another night to live But you're never gonna see me cry the last goodbye (Last goodbye) Is it cloudy where you are tonight All there neon lights shining bright Are you looking for a place to stay To get away (don't get away) And the days are horses down the hill Running fast with no time to kill And the truth is that we'll never know Where love will flow Aim high, shoot low We gotta aim high, shoot low baby Chorus If I could do it over I'd do it all again (over again) And if I got one more chance I wouldn't change a thing Aim high, shoot low Aim high, shoot low... Chorus x 2

woot! crunch time! in about 30 mins i'm gonna know if i'm in that should i should i not phase. right. stupid huh? rule no. 1 never listen to depressing songs when feeling slightly depressed. cos honestly speaking, when depressed, those sappy cheerful songs sound positively horrible. big turn off. so well. that's a stupid rule i made up if ye ask me. right. let's see if the fish catches the bait. i'm feeling really stupid right now. oh well.

ok. so i lied. it's more then an hour. hmm am in a depressed/tingly mood right now. tis wierd really. i seem to do my best writing in this mood. right now i'm just pondering over how come some things can strike u so hard, but you get afraid to just do anything about it. i'll let whoever is reading this figure out what i mean. i'm just gonna be cryptic for now. the eternal question for guys/gals/teens my age. and younger. should i? should i not. :) go figure

Heya! just started my new blog. as you can see i hope to turn this blog into a funny blog where u can watch the world through funny eyes. right. that's the general idea anyway. who knows. i might actually suck at this. i'll post stuff as and when i feel like it. though i suspect it's gonna be a long run. gotta keep my writing skills up to scratch. so.... there! will be right back in a hour or two when i get bored enough. :)